Urbanex and Trump pt. 2: Clinton Hispanders, Gay Nazi Zombies


The first thing I saw as Mike and I walked into the abandoned hospital was a huge yin yang symbol painted on the wall and a scrawled message in favor of ‘pussy’. A perfect christening for the moment, a celebratory message that beckoned us to investigate more. This was only supposed to be a dry run to see how accessible the place was but how could we stop now? The huge abandoned building was right here, right now…we had to look.

Unlike this old structure, the internet search I began doing for legitimate poll numbers on Trump was not a wondrous visual event. My hunt led me to sites like RealClearPolitics and other self touted ‘reliable sources for news’; a maze of subjective articles slanted toward one political persuasion or the other. If you’re a right wing zealot about your politics, sites flourish with rhetoric and half truths on Obama and Clinton, tree huggers and abortionists, all packaged for you neatly to tag and use as a reference for your friends and argumentative friends. I ran across an article someone wrote on Hillary Clinton stating the senator had sunk so low in her campaign as to begin ‘hispandering‘ for votes. Hispandering is a new political term this writer is trying to infuse the public with, referring to someone pandering votes to Hispanic voters by using familiars to conjure a false claim to kinship. Hillary had placed an article on her campaign website listing eight ways she was just like your abuela (grandmother). I thought this was no more dramatic than past politicians have done in their campaign runs. The Bush brothers are notorious for giving speeches or speaking in Spanish to audiences and I can’t say that really even serves much to rack up poll numbers, but here this writer was calling out Hillary as if this were some cheap, heinous attempt to persuade Latino voters into her swarm of the Damned. The story tried hard to makes news out of no news.

The hospital stretched out like a decaying hydra, one corridor leading into two, leading into more. There was something to see no matter which way you turned and you had no idea which way to turn. Thanks to some previous roamers (or squatters) at this place we were able to follow a path of arrows on the walls that kept us from stumbling into dead ends. So much refuse and waste being aged and disintegrating out here not far from the traffic of everyday life in this small town. Locals surely pass it all the time and don’t give it a second thought, as it goes with so many of our urban structures out there just rotting away. There is an indescribable feeling you get walking into a room filled with peeling paint on every wall, surfaces of trashed out technology forming mold and fungus…at any moment you could round a corner and run into some wild bird, trapped in the bowels of this place and screaming it’s nightmarish hell-song as it tries to find a way out into the open sky. One of the highest peaks in this place was in the new wing and we eventually ended up there on the sixth (or was it seventh?) floor. The rooms up here had been gutted but walls were finely decorated with various graffiti and tags-specifically from some tribe calling themselves the ‘Nazi Zombies’. If I read the walls right, there were two truths about these Nazi zombies I could ascertain; one, that the Nazi Zombies hated black people and two, the Nazi Zombies loved to suck dick. Now these were their claims as tagged on their domain up there. This didn’t appear to be a case where they wrote it and someone else came along and added the dick sucking part. The slogans seemed to come from them so until I could prove otherwise, I will take these telltale signs of  Nazi zombies to you.

I believe the image of a bunch of racist gay Nazi zombies was about what it took to push the Trump thing out of my head for a bit. I was totally surrounded by the high of this urbanex. My pursuit of political truth would be put on hold, because that monster was an endless headed hydra that just led you from one dead end to another. I needed to change what it was I was looking for on the internet. I might never find true numbers on Trump because they were hidden down some dark corridor that was guarded by a hispandering Hillary Clinton.


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