The Syrian Powderkeg is Lit: How We Can Kill Honey Boo Boo


There’s a growing lack of something in most people’s diet causing extensive internal damage – that something is human contact. Syria sits on the brink of igniting a worldwide battle and still, most Americans dream their only solace lies inside the monitor of a computer or on the face of a smartphone. I continue to venture out into the world and engage those I meet and can tell you, there is something out there that will heal your soul. You may not believe it until you try it a few times but trust me; there is an appeasing quality within human engagement that you won’t find anywhere else.

News stories keep us informed on recent Middle East uprisings but factual accounts are sketchy and we are left to trust the objectivity of whatever news provider we’re currently tuned in on. Now could these news stories be biased, cherry picked coverage to keep a contained audience content?…you can bet your fucking boots they’re biased. Media conglomerates found out how to corral chunks of the viewing public with reality TV programming, a visceral mixture of entertainment and emotional programming. At what point did we actually consider our leisure pacifier to boil down to watching Honey Boo Boo while swilling down a Heart Smart microwave dinner?

The touchy scenario for our fearless leader, Barack “Hope and Change”, is the balance of conflict brought about by Syria’s recent unrest. Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad, was not meant to be in charge. His brother, Bassel al-Assad, was expected to take over as President of Syria but died in a car accident which left Bashar the new President. Bassel had been groomed at an early age to be the next leader of Syria – his father and former President, Hafez Assad, was publicly referred to as Abu Basil” (Father of Bassel). European and Arab leaders were introduced to Bassel, everything was in line for him to take over and keep the game plan rolling, then he’s taken down in a fucking car wreck…now everybody has to shift gears and start from scratch with Bashar and no one knows dick about how this guy will behave.

My outings into the public involve a lot of live music shows. This is where I have found a great source of enrichment by coming into contact with fellow humans that share a desire to enjoy their lives rather than let it be numbed away under the dome of monitors and keyboards. The irony of live entertainment is that not enough people are jamming into these venues to make it profitable for bar and club owners to book acts, yet they can’t persuade people to come to their clubs or bars if they don’t provide live entertainment. Without enough boots through the door there is no profit to be made, which means the club owners can’t afford to pay the bands, which means the bands will stop playing there. It’s a vicious circle that can be eliminated if more of the public becomes willing to jump in and help. If just one-maybe two days out of the week, more people got off their ass and went to a club, this would do a number of positive things. First, it would kill programs like Honey Boo Boo by ignoring them into obscurity. Second, it would provide income revenue for clubs to pay indie bands an adequate amount to play, giving more people paying jobs. Last, it will give folks that human contact I wrote about earlier, the unseen medicine to heal the psyche. If you think watching Duck Dynasty is funny wait until you go out in the real world and come into contact with creatures equally as bizarre…much more enriching.

Bashar has been accused of using chemical weapons and bringing down the hammer on his public. The images coming out of Syria are abhorrent and concise, collaborative news is hard to come by. Substantiated reporting is being stifled, reporters are being fired at, accurate coverage is sketchy at best. Is Bashar really doing all these monstrous things, gassing kids and women, or is this a ‘wag the dog’ to hide the covert dance going on between Middle East leaders, Russia and the U.S.? Conspiracies are getting mashed up with the reality of this situation at the speed of the internet so how can we say for certain what’s in the plans of the future over there? We’re an ocean away from the true world happenings and any speculation as to what might happen is just that; speculation.

In contrast, we Americans do have the ability to do something about the real live, local spots where folks gather to dance and sing and forget their troubles for a while. If we make an effort to get out more often, it will become as habitual as clicking in to view reality TV or typing away on some social network like Facebook. Facebook will be there, with all it’s frustrations and dulling memes, whenever you come back. Honey Boo Boo may not and I’ll be the first to cheer when they kill (not literally) that pudgy fucking kid who has amassed more cash than I will see for years, merely by being a modern day circus geek for us to stare and laugh at….stop making the little kid bite the head off chickens folks, get out and support your local bands!

I give no final analysis on the Syrian situation because it’s far from over. America cannot support a policy that turns a blind eye toward weapons of mass destruction but this conflict has an underlying stench that makes me wonder what’s really going on. If the world leaders allow chemical weapons to be used and the instigators to go unpunished, this leaves the door open to future chemical attacks…and Israel really doesn’t want to hear that because they know a half dozen countries near the Persian Gulf would like nothing better than for them to be wiped off the face of this planet. My issue remains that there has not been enough – and the key word here is ‘enough’ – substantiated information regarding the whole trauma in Damascus and other parts of Syria. How easy it was for us to point the finger of accusation at Saddam Hussein and cry about him using chemical weapons on his people, but if you remember, America was a key supplier of those nasty things to encourage them to use against Iran when they were in conflict with one another…doesn’t this at least give you some pause?

Now o out and watch a band and have a beer….you’ll feel better.


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