Paul Ryan; The Fish Picks a Wallflower

I went into a local convenience store owned by this Lebanese man and needed to buy one of my daughters a soda but all I had was a debit card. When we got up to the counter the man said there had to be a $5 minimum on a card, at which point I walked away from the counter and soda. “Wait a minute” he called out. He gave me the soda and said I could pay him back the next time I was in the store-gave me a cola on fucking credit.

The announcement came out that Mitt-the Filet ‘O Fish’ Romney has tagged Wisconsin Representative Paul Ryan as his Vice Presidential running candidate. The Borowitz Report nailed it by stating “An exhaustive manhunt that took months and spanned the country came to a dramatic end today as a less interesting person than Mitt Romney turned up in Wisconsin”. Now the stage is locked and loaded for the finals in this run for the White House. The Mormon Monster is ready to climb in the ring for Round Four (by my card) and get back at it with The Great Hope and Change, the Fiery Beast with purported Dual Citizenship. This campaign challenge that has less impact that a dog fart is off and running at a dying snail’s pace.

The announcement of this less than exciting choice is no more than I would have expected, much less than I had hoped for from a Republican nod on this seat. As for trying to come up with a suitable-or tolerable-choice for Democrats to eye and possibly abandon their party’s ship, the GOP shouldn’t even think twice. The numbers you might get on that return will be so miniscule, no matter who the choice, that it’s not worth abandoning your own party. Ryan will do fine as a choice, until something comes out of the woodwork like him being caught on tape participating in an air tight session on a Taiwan hooker. He’s not as nefarious as Dick Cheny was, and not as stupid as Dan Quayle; let the Republicans have their party representative. People aren’t that concerned about Vice Presidents because they’re like the second string quarterback; you know the second stringer is there and you hope you never have to rely on him, but don’t let that fear stop you from enjoying the game. Few VPs have had much influence on national decisions, I actually feel that the First Lady ends up accomplishing more than a Vice President. If I am wrong then I welcome Joe Biden coming to my place and correcting me so I can nod my head at him, then tell him to suck my dick, just because he’s a Vice President.

Let’s all watch Ryan and try not to let the press get us all worked up in a fevered pitch over this less-than-news event. In the meantime, I am walking down to the convenience store to pay this guy off for the soda.


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