29
Mar
12

The Dichotomy of Politics; Two Sides of Bedlam pt. 1

I had been planning this venture for weeks once I saw a posting online: The Denver Metro Young Republicans were holding their monthly meeting tonight and I needed to get there. My objective was to mill among the crowd of conservative men and women and witness-firsthand-what such an animal as a Denver Metro Young Republican looks like up close, what they think, what they feel-if they feel. I felt it my duty to see if the portrayal of the right wing political devotee as sensationalized by the press was accurate or exaggerated; was the heinous crap coming out of their pie holes as nasty as reported? I needed to give them the same courtesy I had given the liberal left and lie down with the dogs, see if I get fleas.
First things first: I needed to dress somewhat appropriate for the event. I couldn’t show up in some ragged tshirt with ‘Obama Care’ scrawled in blood across the chest, they might scatter like zebras from an approaching lioness. They tend to frown on someone showing up looking like Travis Bickle from Taxi Driver. I chose to wear long pants and a collared shirt with an American flag pinned on my jacket, a real ‘Father Knows Best look to conceal the demon beneath. My tag along electronics at hand, vast amounts of drugs and off I went to discover what a Denver Republican was about.

I piped off a large amount of weed and climbed on the Colfax bus to make my way downtown to Hamburger Marys, an urban watering hole on 17th with superb food and drink. The meeting would be held with the guest speaker, Ryan Call, leading the discussion and fielding questions. I was running late but I would not miss this. I sat next to some hard working stiff on the bus and told him I was going to attend the young Republicans meeting. He gave me this shocked look, as if I just told him I was going downtown to hit baby chicks with a hammer. My attempts at any ambiguous conversation ended there so I sat back and jammed on my IPod. After a few cuts from an Alice in Chains album screaming through my ear buds I had come to the general vicinity of the event and left the working class behind. Once off the bus I realized just how disoriented I was. The nice thing about technology is you can pull out your phone and click this little button that reads ‘where am I?’ and it shows you exactly where you are in the world….handy when high. I sauntered through a few alleys, lighting up the remains in my pipe and continued my journey. This area is one of those pleasant little pockets in Denver; old historic buildings, J Crew sweaters on middle aged housewives walking their dogs with hubby at hand. In spite my attempts to blend in down here I stuck out like a fused bomb.It was best to hurry the rest of the trip as their meeting had begun thirty minutes ago.

Before I knew it Hamburger Marys was right in front of me and I wandered through their crowd of regular patrons to a side room where the Republican’s meeting was being held. I anticipated opening the door onto a room full of methed out klansmen beating the shit out of an Obama effigy or perhaps a room of Agent Smith drones from the Matrix, all staring at me from behind sunglasses, pointing at me declaring “you’re not one of us!” Time to calm down, the pot was working overtime on my paranoia….time to open the door and face the music.

 

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