President’s Day and Other Worthless Junk

Here it is, that favored among holidays, President’s Day. Families and schools all work extra hard on this hallowed national celebration to educate, honor and inform our youth with stories of valor and-wait a minute, I think a monkey just blew out my butt. This long dead homage to the forefathers of our nation has long since been whittled into nothing more than another day the banks are closed and one more sale on furniture. No one seems to pay attention any longer to this day, a few piecemeal gatherings in our nation’s capital, maybe a small bake-off in some small town church but for the most part our country has turned it’s back on honoring the leader of our country. Put their face on a dollar coin and leave it up to Uncle Fred to tell the kids all about the old days when President (fill in the name here) used to (fill in the achievement here).

With all the availability modern web search engines place at our disposal to convey, educate and inform the public on the subtle nuances our leaders have brought forth, the good, the bad and the ugly, giant moguls like Yahoo chose to carry these stories on their news banner:

Rihanna wows red carpet in daring gown.

Phillies player Roy Halladay arrives at spring training in a classic car.

Golfer Phil Mikelson shares a funny moment with a spectator after his tee shot rolls into an unlikely place.

90 year old Jeanne Harr honors Whitney Houston by dancing to the song “I Wanna Dance With Somebody.”

Jesus, take me now. Just have a big truck hit me at about 90 mph and turn me to sludge. What the fuck happened to a little thing called news? On this day of all days they should be painting our laptop screens with images of George Washington crossing the Delaware, Roosevelt with is fiery finger in the air, John Kennedy, Ronald Reagan-any of the Presidents we’ve elected to office but what do we get? We get “Oscar winners most embarrassing roles”. I wouldn’t worry about our politicians taking this country to shambles, I think we’ll do it alone.

On a very basic level, search engines hunt out stories that get the most clicks online. The more hits, the more likely the story is going to go viral and turn up on everyone’s computer for the next few hours. Granted there will be the kid factor; children view and operate laptops and go online but they can’t be the resource that bumped the popularity of that 90 year old humping it to a Houston tune. Kids are scared of people that old. Someone, somewhere has to be the filter, the point at which these stories pop up. Over and over again, some group of Neanderthals out there continue to click on Hollywood trash stories to see what their favorite star wore yesterday to some event no one ever heard of, and as a result, we have no story on the war in Afghanistan, we have Rhianna shaking her ass on the catwalk. Rather than inform the public on the latest news update tracing the billions lost in the Iraq war, we have a golfer shaking his stick. Rather than educate your kid and anyone else in your household who has no idea who the current Vice President of the United States is (go ahead, ask a kid under the age of twelve, I dare you), we have George fucking Clooney telling us his most embarrassing job; I’ve got an embarrassing job for you right here George.

If we really want to dull our senses to the point of being stimulated by nothing more than flashing lights and funny sounds, we’re well on our way folks, but just remember. There is an entire world that we are but only a part of. If you want to stand up and be proud of your country, as so many are fond of saying, then why don’t you work at making it something to be proud of. If you cherish the idea of having a democracy where you are allowed to elect your country’s leader, and pledge an allegiance to the ideals this country set forth to be governed by such a leader, then why not show at least an iota of support for the individual who wakes up every day and faces a shit can full of obligation, war, hunger and economic chaos on behalf of us all.  I’m not asking you to give your undying support for the President of these United States, I would just hope you could give him a moment on Yahoo news, a blurb as equal in size to Rhianna’s red dress story. Teach your children about what a President stands for in our nation, let the 90 year old dancing granny story die.


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