It’s the Holiday Season…Who Would Have Known?

“Another sound from you…

and you’ll keep your Christmas by losing your situation!”

-Ebineezer Scrooge, ‘A Christmas Carol’

Thanksgiving has come and gone and everyone’s getting excited about DongZhi, the best of all holidays…or maybe it’s Soyaluna, that festive Hopi celebration. Whatever you plan to celebrate this December, be happy and spread your cheer amongst the masses because we all could use a little happiness. Enrich yourselves and with other cultures greetings and promote to others your age long traditions. We have so much to be thankful for so don’t be a sour ass about it.

This time of year usually brings about dismay and stress because people all over are hurried about trying to meet company deadlines before their place of business shuts down for a few days, desperately seeking that perfect gift for that not-so-perfect relative and basically too scared to utter the words “Merry Christmas” out in open public. A while back most retail stores took it upon themselves to become politically pussified into taking those two words out of their standard customer conversation. Too many individuals who got coal in their stocking or have no one to be with on the holidays or worship the fucking cabbage complained to management and we lost that smiling response at the mall. A growing number of my friends tell me they stopped saying it as well because they were given a response of “Happy Holidays” whenever the uttered the ‘c’ word to cashiers. Don’t let them win folks, hit’em with a big Merry Christmas.

Cheer up people, it’s Christmas. You remember it from when you were a kid, the only thing that’s changed is your attitude to spread good will to all in the face of mediocrity. Put it out there and you might be astonished at how it will spread. Make sure not to go overboard though and ignore or refuse to respect other religious observations at this time of year. I have a few Jewish friends who make it a point to let me know that they don’t observe Christmas which is fine with me. They let me eat ham and I leave their dradle the fuck alone, everyone’s kosher-er, happy. Tell me what you would like me to know about Ashura and I will gladly listen, I want to make people feel they have the right to celebrate what may be a life long tradition to their families. Encompass one another and make everyone feel welcome with who they are.

I believe one of the biggest instigators of our seasonal misgivings are (once again) the media and the government. By strict law and standards put down since Moses parted the Red Sea with a stick of wood (?) American law has prohibited the display of religious scenes, artifacts and icons from appearing on public property. Fine, who the fuck cares? Let those drab buildings of stone and blood stand lifeless like a gravestone for all I care. As for the media their main stories will more than likely revolve around government’s lack of allowing said decorations on their hallowed walls. That subject is moot as we should all focus on family, not the motherfuckers who work at putting this country in the crapper. Let the news continue to babble about those old walruses on Capitol Hill while we ring in a joyous time with one another, celebrate our diversity and basically get along with one another. Put up a tree and turn on a light, welcome all people and greet them with open arms because after the holidays it will be 2012 and back to finding a job for a million or so people in this country, fighting a few wars and seeing what sock monkey they put in office.


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